what's it like not having a foreskin?

[hatam_soferet]

Today at Hadar we were talking about covenant, and one of the gentlemen in the class, waxing lyrical, said something like "this covenant we inscribe in our flesh..."

Well, only when "we" means "we chaps," and it's yet another of those statements that means very little to most of those present, who have no covenant inscribed in their flesh on account of having ladybits. So I got to wondering.

If you've got the covenant inscribed in your flesh, in the form of a line of scar tissue proclaiming "foreskin woz ere," does it remind you of the covenant every time you see it? Or does it get so's you don't notice it?

I am seriously jolly interested in the answer, but if I know you IRL can you spare my feelings and comment anonymously?

Comments

[lady_eclectic]

I have no experiences with foreskin, but how I reconcile it myself as a non-foreskin Jew is by equating my menstrual cycle with the foreskin. To me, my menses is 'the covenant of the blood' and also a primal signifyer (symbolically at least) of being to sustain the Covenant of Abraham through procreation. I'm sure one can poke holes in my 'hypothesis' but it helps me. It helps me in constructing my profound sense of covenant, it helps me appreciate my cycle and appreciate mikvah.

Just my two cents :)

[(Anonymous)]

not remembering ever having one, and unable to recognize the scar tissue wherever it is... just don't think about it very much. can't imagine what it would be like to have one or what it would look like. the way I am is completely normal and unremarkable to me.

[another_constellation]

Interesting question. I was assigned female at birth and identify as a genderqueer man, so I've given a fair amount of thought to the importance of a foreskin and penis in Judaism, particularly as I'm converting. Unfortunately I... don't have a concrete answer. I have thought about doing what many cis male converts who were already circumcised do and have my foreskin pricked to symbolize circumcision, but have also been paying attention to (both secular and Jewish) anti-circumcision discussions. Since I live in the US, where most male-assigned babies are circumcised secularly upon birth, it all gets even weirder and more complicated because here, circumcision isn't really thought of as a Jewish thing, but (dubiously) as a cleanliness thing, or aesthetic. Your non-Jewish friends are most likely all circumcised, so it's not really a visual mark. In the locker room, no one asks you if you're Jewish because of your lack of foreskin. For all of these reasons, I wouldn't be surprised if it often feels like less of a mark of the covenant here. I also do wonder somewhat about children being circumcised so young. I don't mean this cruelly, but if people entered into circumcision when older, if they really made the choice to have their genitals scarred and part of them removed, I imagine that one rite might mean more. It would, however, likely be an incredibly painful, traumatic, and complicated episode.

So, like I said, no answers, just more thoughts.

[(Anonymous)]

Not every time, but a significant fraction of the time, yes.

[(Anonymous)]

What he said.

[hatam_soferet]

You make me compare to Jews in Hellenism, you know, where they tried to reconstruct their foreskins so as to look like everyone else, and the rabbis were cheesed off - should the rabbis be equally cheesed off that American Jews still look like everyone else? (Slightly facetious, but not wholly.)

It would, however, likely be an incredibly painful, traumatic, and complicated episode.

I dunno - don't some sorts of Muslims circumcise at adolescence? Not really the kind of thing one can barge into a community and ask, though - o hai did having yore foreskin snipped at thirteen make you feel covenantal sort of thing.

[(Anonymous)]

+1

[(Anonymous)]

+ another 1

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, me too.

BTW, "ladybits"? How twee can you get?

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think about much at all.

BTW, I wound up having a kosher brit milah (actually, hatafat dam ha-brit) at a more advanced age (in my 40s, IIRC). I was circ'ed in the hospital. At some point, it occurred to me that although the circ was done by a Jewish doctor, there was no that it could be kosher. That's because I was born on 22 Dec, and I was brought home on my parents' anniversary, which was 28 Dec. So the circ was done too early.

[tig_b]

I know a Turkish family who come from an area where the boys are circumcised at puberty; usually in small groups of local boys, with big celebrations.

They bought us back the video - which includes a parade through the streets with the boys wearing fancy white satin, gold-trimmed suits. The op was on the video as well, but I closed my eyes for that bit as it seemed odd watching it with the boy, his parents and his sisters. It is all followed by an enormous family party.

Yes it hurt, but it is part of the 'I'm a man now' culture so they don't complain.